why me

Okay yes I am everyone says i am its because all my life i didn't think anyone cared about me yes even my parents. I have no siblings, so i've always been by myself. I sucked. I always had to act perfect for everyone do what everyone says for me to do. Then one day i woke up and stopped that feeling especially after finding out that there were guys out there that found me attractive. Until i slept with them after a few times then that was it they wanted me as a fuck friend. That hurt so from that day i promised myself no more falling in love cause i fall hard and get hurt easily. Then one day i found a guy who was interested into more than just sex. He liked my personality. I told him it would talke awhile before i could fall in love well it didn't take to long cause he's my life now. He's everything to me. At times i think he's getting sick of me cause i want to be close to him. I never had that i love that feeling. Its the most amazing feelings. Yes i want to give him some space but how can i when i have no car and no real home. I don't want to drive him away as like i said he's my life he's my reason for living.

My feelings

Ok not cool. Something is wronge. I have had a great time in my life then out of the blue it becomes shitty. I'm getting mixed emotions. I'm so in love its. I'm so in love that its hurting. i want to be with my one true love but it seems as if he's trying to back off now that he has teh freedom he's off house arrest. I promised myseld i'd never feeling this way again but how can i when i love this guy to death. I fell hard in love with this guy. He's my life. If he is lossing interst in me then i have nothing left. I know this is fucked up but what do you do. I'm an emotional reck i can't stand not being near him. Hearing his voice looking at his eyes and smile. He makes me glow with happiness.